The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships

"I ordered the books (anger.deception.intimacy) from the author and I enjoyed them. However,something that I noticed was that the author does not anywhere acknowledge her clients who HAPPEN to be the source of her material for her books. She gives a short paragraph about the clients on the flip side(next page) of the "thank you's" page saying basically that she has changed everything about the person so that she may use their material. I spent most of my life being minimized or discounted or negated by people like this who could use my life's material for her own personal gain and frankly I am offended by it. I find it extremely distasteful that she (the author) thanks every teacher, scholar, professor, friend,thanks her husband and kids for her success and does not EVEN begin to thank her clients who, if she didn't have them, who be a big NOBODY in this business. How Narcissistic! I plan on counting up the number of people the author owes an amends to.....I have looked over every single book and have not found acknowledgement, if I am wrong...please let me know..."
~ Written on 1999-03-19

"This book was loaned to me by a counselor who I had worked with on my way out of an abusive marriage. Longing for a connection with someone who was not abusive, I couldn't understand the distancing that was taking place until I read this book. I also gained valuable insight into why my intense efforts to coerce cooperation from my 3 year old were, in fact, a result of trying to reduce the anger of his abusive father - a triangle I had imposed. The information can be a good tool to help sort out relationships that haven't gone smoothly."
~ Written on 1999-01-01

"This book was recommended to me at a very difficult time in my life. It helped me develop new ways of dealing with problematic relationships and people by first looking at my reactions and how I dealt with the situation. I truly believe that this is the best way because we all have the ability to be happy in our relationships if we are able to calmly work through problems and keep in mind the guidelines that the book provides."
~ Written on 1998-09-08

"It may sound pop-psych. It may sound trendy, but there is something to the idea that successful relationships, harmful or healthy, involve the participants moving in tandem. When one tries to change the steps, perhaps toward a healthier mode of behavior and relating, the other partner is likely to try anything to return to the common "dance." It IS helpful to identify these patterns, whatever name you want to give it, whatever "hook" or "spin." Having a common language to identify these behavior patterns is helpful, above all, if that's the only thing you get from the book, though I believe there's much more here than that."
~ Written on 1998-07-22

"The author apparently does not have a very wide awareness of life's possibilities. Her main point is that all you have to do is to communicate with your mother, and you will find that she has loved you all along. Personally, I only started to heal when I realised that my mother would never value me in any way, and I found this book very invalidating. See books by Susan Forward and Christina Crawford for recognition of what relationships can really be like, and what to do about them."
~ Written on 1998-03-11