Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You
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By: Susan Forward and Donna Frazier
Format: Paperback
From: Harper Paperbacks
Pub. Date: February 1998
From: Harper Paperbacks
Pub. Date: February 1998
Product Details:
Catalog: Book
Release Date: 1998-03-04
Media: Paperback
Number Of Pages: 272
Ean: 9780060928971
Isbn: 0060928972
Catalog: Book
Release Date: 1998-03-04
Media: Paperback
Number Of Pages: 272
Ean: 9780060928971
Isbn: 0060928972
ABOUT THE BOOK
EDITORIAL REVIEW
"If you really loved me..."
"After all I've done for you..."
"How can you be so selfish..."
Do any of the above sound familiar? They're all examples of emotional blackmail, a powerful form of manipulation in which people close to us threaten to punish us for not doing what they want. Emotional blackmailers know how much we value our relationships with them. They know our vulnerabilities and our deepest secrets. They are our mothers, our partners, our bosses and coworkers, our friends and our lovers. And no matter how much they care about us, they use this intimate knowledge to give themselves the payoff they want: our compliance.
Susan Forward knows what pushes our hot buttons. Just as John Gray illuminates the communications gap between the sexes in Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, and Harriet Lerner describes an intricate dynamic in The Dance of Anger, so Susan Forward presents the anatomy of a relationship damaged by manipulation, and gives readers an arsenal of tools to fight back. In her clear, no-nonsense style, Forward provides powerful, practical strategies for blackmail targets, including checklists, practice scenarios and concrete communications techniques that will strengthen relationships and break the blackmail cycle for good.
"After all I've done for you..."
"How can you be so selfish..."
Do any of the above sound familiar? They're all examples of emotional blackmail, a powerful form of manipulation in which people close to us threaten to punish us for not doing what they want. Emotional blackmailers know how much we value our relationships with them. They know our vulnerabilities and our deepest secrets. They are our mothers, our partners, our bosses and coworkers, our friends and our lovers. And no matter how much they care about us, they use this intimate knowledge to give themselves the payoff they want: our compliance.
Susan Forward knows what pushes our hot buttons. Just as John Gray illuminates the communications gap between the sexes in Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, and Harriet Lerner describes an intricate dynamic in The Dance of Anger, so Susan Forward presents the anatomy of a relationship damaged by manipulation, and gives readers an arsenal of tools to fight back. In her clear, no-nonsense style, Forward provides powerful, practical strategies for blackmail targets, including checklists, practice scenarios and concrete communications techniques that will strengthen relationships and break the blackmail cycle for good.
USER REVIEWS
"The book IS great, you can read about its value in every other review on this site. I will not repeat them, instead I will tell about the little "but..": most of "healthy" or "non-pathological" relationships we support is not of the bipolar model of the offender and the offended one. Usually we use some forms of lightweight blackmail in one place where receive it in another: it is very hard to draw a distinct rule between asking and manipulating, and the more we need/want/desire something from the partner the blurrier is the border. And unfortunately you will find anything but help in "double blackmail", "crossfire", where BOTH sides of the story can read the book and find that they are the victims. The only hope is that they both get smarter with reading the book and start talking to each other. Which is very likely, as the book IS great indeed ;)"
~ Written on 2008-07-22
~ Written on 2008-07-22
"I myself am currently in the FOG that she describes in this and it has hit home very well and helping me redeem myself. She's VERY good at explaining and assisting. Sometimes I feel she's right there. Very informative about the different types of emotional blackmailers. I'm not done reading, but have gotten 3/4 of the way and I am so happy I bought this book. It caught my eye one day browsing through the bookstore, never bought it out of fear probably. My friend coaxed me into buying it and I'm glad I did. If anything, it will bring confidence and give you some sort of support while trying to figure out what is going on. Put you in the right direction so you can be free and clear! Basically, this book is AWESOME, INFORMATIVE, and a must read for current victims of emotional blackmail. "
~ Written on 2008-05-25
~ Written on 2008-05-25
"This an amazing look into the reality of emotional abuse. As a therapist I have been recommending this book to my clients. Watch out for an eye opening read!"
~ Written on 2008-02-28
~ Written on 2008-02-28
"This Book is great on its own. The transaction was easy and the book came as described."
~ Written on 2008-01-14
~ Written on 2008-01-14
"I felt this book provided an eyeopening perspective on how we are manipulated by others and in fact may manipulate others. I think it helped me to gain perspective and move forward as I have emerged from an abusive marrige. "
~ Written on 2008-01-03
~ Written on 2008-01-03